This Chick? Again?

Good evening, world.

I know what you must be thinking: "This chick again? Didn't she finish her exchange, like, four years ago?" I'm such an oldie that it's not even funny. But there is a reason I have gathered you all here today... after four years, I have officially returned to the land of jamón and siestas and flamenco. 

Yes, Spain. I am referring to Spain. I sill can´t believe it myself. Here I am, writing to you guys again, FROM SPAIN! What nostalgia... Over the years, I have received a number of emails from exchange students and/or their parents that have read my blog. It is always so lovely to talk with you all! This post is for me, but this post is also for you. I hope you enjoy.

I've been in Spain for almost four weeks now. I tried very hard to resist my blogging urges, but, alas, here we are. This is the first time I've been back to Spain since my exchange in 2011-2012 and I've honestly loved nearly every second of it. I've wanted to come back for so long; I knew that when I did, I would love it, but even so I feel like I'm enjoying myself more than I ever imagined.

My first week in Spain was spent with my host sister, Nuria. As you may remember, she is Spanish and lived with my family in Iowa the year after my exchange. We spent half the week in Madrid and the other half in Barcelona, neither of which I had visited before. I had an amazing time as both of these cities are beautiful and have their own character, and also because regardless of where we may be, there is never a dull moment with Nuria. This was the first time I had seen her since she left Iowa - it felt so surreal when I saw her waiting for me at the airport! She is truly lovely and I could't imagine a better Spanish sister to have. We were able to meet up with one of my friends, Kelsey, from Iowa in Madrid and also with a fellow Rotary friend, Paula, in Barcelona. What an unforgettable week.

Park Güell

Buen Retiro Park

Kilometre Zero in Madrid

Buen Retiro Park

*one* of our churros con chocolate breaks

Palacio de Cristal

From La Exposición Aliadas in CentroCentro, Cibeles, Madrid

Buen Retiro Park

Sagrada Familia

Museo de Jamón, Madrid

Royal Palace of Madrid with Kels

Barcelona

Paula :')

After going to Barcelona, Nuria and I parted ways. She went back home and I went back to my second home, that is, Marbella. I have been in Marbella since, visiting friends, family, and the places I've missed so much (photos likely to come later on). In some ways, everything feels just as I left it four years ago, but in other ways, it feels like everything has changed. Regardless, my friends and family and I have picked up exactly where we left off all that time ago, and for that I am very grateful. My heart feels so full to be surrounded by people here that made an impact on my life. 

Originally, I was going to stay in Des Moines for the summer. However, after a series of events and realizing that rent would actually be more expensive than returning to the paradise that is Marbella, I booked my plane tickets for Spain. That was about mid-April. It was pretty spontaneous. When I had everything booked, I couldn't believe I'd be returning. I was so excited; so in shock. All the emotions. In fact, right before I left for Spain, I was nervous. Scared even? Was I making the right decision spending half my summer in Spain? What if something goes wrong on the bus/train/plane? What if it's weird when I see my friends? Should I be working at home instead? It was as if a wave of anxiety and doubt came over me. I didn't have that when I went to Spain the first time. I thought to myself: "Why this time - shouldn't I feel even more prepared than the last time?" However, all of that went away very quickly upon arriving in Spain. I am now SO happy that I chose to come back and grateful that I was able to. Not only have I been reunited with many people and places I've missed, but I've been able to focus on myself by being away from home and its routine. It's like with each coming day, I realize something new about myself. I don't know how to describe it besides that I simply feel very myself.

I believe that in life, we are continuously changing; slowly but surely we are being sculpted into new versions of ourselves with each experience that life gives us. Each place we go to or person we meet affects us, sometimes even to the point of changing your thoughts and ideals that make you who you are. For example, my exchange year was a huge experience; it had such an impact on me, that the person who came back to the U.S. was much different than the person who had left. Going to school in Minnesota changed who I was. Meeting specific people there changed me. Studying nursing has changed me... All this goes to say that the version of myself that I am today is because of many people and experiences (both large and small) that have led to this very moment. Now, as I revisit the place I was once able to call home, I am reminded of so many memories. I am reminded of 16-year-old Josie. She was so crazy. I can't believe she went to Spain for a year. Who does that?? The longer I am here, the more I feel 16-year-old Josie's spontaneity returning.  For the first time, I believe that a past version of myself is changing the present one. 

Oops - it's 3AM,

Josie

Hasta luego, Diego!

Once again I find myself in a state of transition as summer is ending and I prepare myself for college. Last summer I was preparing for the drastic change of returning home from Spain, and the summer before for my exchange year that lay ahead. It's crazy to think that I am no longer an outbound nor an inbound or even a rebound anymore! I don't even know what to call myself now...

Hi, I am Josie Thurmond - Spain '11-'12; I know it seems like forever ago but it was very real and I miss it so much and you may think I'm an oldie now but... you get the idea.

Many of you may be wondering why I continue to write then. Well, the purpose of this post is to actually wrap this blog up (*tear). I think it'd be nice to finish this nice'n'tidy so here we go.

Rebound year: I never thought coming back home would be so difficult! The reverse-culture shock and adjusting back into your family and finally understanding what "it's all the same, yet all different" means. They weren't lying when they said exchange is more than just your year abroad! It follows you and changes you - I think about Spain everyday. Whether it's a person or a place or maybe a food, I'm reminded of it constantly. However, I no longer feel such a heavy sadness that I am so far from my second home. Instead, I look forward to when I can return someday and be reunited with my friends and family that await me there.

Rebound year can be tough, but it's also a new beginning. Whatever you're facing, think about it like this: whether you're returning to high school, or entering college, it will be in your own language! You just spent a year in a foreign land and now you're on your own turf - nothing should be stopping you from making the most of whatever situation you find yourself in!

Just because you're home doesn't mean your exchange is all over. I have officially been back home for more than a year (August 8th) but I still talk to my friends and family in Spain all the time on Facebook, Skype, Twitter, etc. Just a couple of weeks ago my friend Jon who went to Taiwan in '10-'11 had his host grandparents visit him here! I have friends who have already gone over to their host countries to visit again. It's so encouraging to see because I know the connections we made on exchange will last for life.

As a Rotex member this year, it was almost sad at times to see the outbounds preparing to leave for their host countries - I wanted it to be me going again! I'm starting to realize that the cycle is actually pretty cool to see, even though I get jealous every now and then ;) I did get to watch two of my friends from my outbound class prepare to go on a SECOND exchange this year! Some of you who have read through my posts may remember Nohema who went to France 11-12? Well now she is in Brazil for the 13-14 year for a gap year before college!

As for me, exactly one week from tomorrow, I will be going to North Central University in Minneapolis to study Psychology and Intercultural Studies/Global Missions. I cannot wait for what the next 4 years have in store (hopefully a semester or two abroad, eh?). Unfortunately I will not be a member of Rotex anymore, as I will be too far from District 6000 to be able to fully participate in Rotex sponsored events. Being a part of Rotex this past year has been amazing though and I would definitely recommend it to any outbound/rebounds who are considering joining. It's a great group that will never get tired of hearing about your crazy exchange stories, and it's a prefect outlet for your fresh exchange knowledge as current outbounds are preparing for their year abroad.

It's weird to consider that I would have never expected my senior year to turn out like it did when I left for exchange. I hadn't met my best friends, Ben and Nuria, until this August. I didn't expect to attend the college I'm going to until I visited last winter. I didn't know my current boyfriend until January. I didn't know any of the inbounds/outbounds (from this year) until the first Rotex event that took place in October, yet I consider many of these crazy foreign people my close friends. Exchange is bizarre, and I don't know where I'd be right now had I not gone to Spain my junior year. I am so glad I was crazy enough to go though. The experiences and memories that I made there will last forever, and for that I am so grateful.

I hope that you all have enjoyed this journey with me and that I was able to help you out in some way over the past two and a half years. Still feel free to email me for whatever reason - I love hearing from other exchange students (it's a special bond we have I'm pretty sure!). I am thinking about starting a personal blog, so if I do I will make sure to inform y'all. Until then, make sure to check out these other exchange blogs from some fellow District 6000 outbounds!

Jonah Marks (Spain) - http://jonahmarks.blogspot.com
Ben Ellis (Austria) - http://bentravel-reisen.blogspot.com/

Thank you devoted readers, that will be all for now.
Hasta la proxima vez!

Besos,
Josie

Back "Home" - Part 2

Hello readers,

We're nearing the end of spring break, and similar to this time last year, I feel things are slowly but surely coming to a close. There's a basic countdown of things that most seniors have in mind after spring break, and I guess I'm no exception. It goes something like this:

• Scholarships
• Prom
• Graduation
• Summer
• Work for college money
• Use said college money to go out with friends and/or buy tacos
• College

It's strange because a year ago, I wasn't thinking too much about these things, apart from deciding which college to attend. I was busy working on my Spanish, traveling to different places, and making the most of my exchange year with friends. That's a part of exchange though -- many exchange students say that, "Exchange isn't a year in your life; it's a life in a year." Now, I find that almost too cheesy to even publish in this blog, but there is some truth to it. If your exchange is good, then your host country will become another home, almost as if it's a life separate than your actual home. This is great on exchange, however, when coming home it can make things quite complicated. 

It's like this: when you first go to your host country, it isn't like another home. It's foreign and unfamiliar. Coming back to your home country is quite different in the sense that it is home. Even after a year abroad, it is a special part of you where your family, friends, and familiar places await you, yet you still have your host country/second home in mind. 

Am I making sense?

This is why coming home can be so difficult. Your heart is in two places but you can only stand in one. Sometimes, jumping back into your life of your home country is hard because the once-familiar seems foreign; some people call this reverse culture shock. For most people, reverse culture shock is harder to deal with than the original culture shock in their host country. 

For me, everything went pretty well the first few days being back. Everyone was curious about my year in Spain, and I was excited to tell them. Nuria arrived in Iowa the day after I got back, which was both exciting and strange to be on the other side of hosting. I got back into working and running with the cross country team, and school actually started about two or three weeks after coming home. It was easy to stay busy, something that we as Americans are notorious for. After a month though, things were different. People stopped asking about Italy or Brazil or wherever it was that I went. For me, it was hard to realize that I was actually staying home. I wouldn't be returning to Spain anytime soon, and Newton wasn't just a vacation. (Isn't it weird how similar the inbound and rebound year are?) 

School was much harder, that's for sure! I wasn't used to studying so much! Figuring out who to hang out with was kinda weird -- a lot of my close friends had moved or graduated while I was in Spain. In cross country I was motivated, but physically I wasn't in shape! I didn't gain weight in Spain, however, I did lose just about all my muscle and replaced it with Nutella. My family was pretty awesome about things because they tried to understand what I was going through, even though they couldn't completely. For a while I was consistently thinking in Spanglish still, and a few times I awkwardly blurted things out in Spanglish. My English is definitely worse than before as far as spelling goes, but it's improving. I retook the ACT and scored 3 points lower than my sophomore year. Advice to outbounds: make sure to take the ACT/SAT before you go abroad!! In Spain I would see people and think they were friends from the U.S. Well now I see people in the U.S. who remind me of people in Spain! It can be quite confusing and sad sometimes. 

As I near the end of my senior year though, I can say that things do get better. For all my dear exchange students reading this, don't worry, because it will get better, just like it does on your exchange. My study habits still aren't great, but they're better. I'm in track/field right now, and I've almost got all my muscle back ;) (Even with eating Nutella). I've even got some pretty nice friends, if I do say so myself. (Shout-out to some of them at the bottom!) I'm also a part of Rotex, a group of students that have gone on exchange and now mentor current inbound/outbound students. We (in Rotary District 6000) are in the process of making Rotex an official organization. Our ultimate goal is to improve Rotary Youth Exchange. 

I could go on and on about the roller coaster of exchange because it doesn't just end when you leave your host country. (For your sake, I won't.) Some people say that after exchange, you are never truly at home. It's a sad truth, but the thought of having another place across the globe to call yours is pretty cool. I can't wait to visit Spain again, but it may be a while. I have to figure out how to pay for this whole college deal first. Until then, I'll continue to Skype and Tweet my friends in Spain, in addition to the other exchange students I met in Spain that are scattered across the globe. 

The moral of this story is that life goes on, but it's okay. A lot of changes happen during this stage of life for people my age - for rebounds all the feelings that go along with it are just multiplied by about 10,000. But we survive -- we even have fun with it. Coming "home" can be a fresh start if you make it to be. 

Okay, I'll stop now. 

Lots of love,

Josie

Shout-out to some of the people who have helped me the most this year!
Ben, Me, Nuria, and Carolyn. Zombies for life! (Get it?)

Back Home - Part 1

Dear readers,

Good evening :) (Good morning to my friends in Spain!) Aren't time differences tricky sometimes?

(**Note: This post will be split up into two parts -- after writing for a while, I realized there was way too much to say for just one post!**)

Today I was talking to Nuria and I realized that I have been back in the U.S. for over SIX MONTHS. That's over a half a year! That's 60% of the duration of my exchange year. You get it. (For those of you who don't know, Nuria is an inbound exchange student from Burgos, Spain. She lived in my house from August until December, but now she is with a different family. We're pretty tight and I'm currently plotting to kidnap her from her current host family...)

Back to what I was saying though - SIX MONTHS! It's really strange how time goes by. Since I haven't blogged since October, I should probably catch you all up what my life as rebounder as been like. FIRST though, I must fill you all in on my last days in Spain, as promised in my previous post four months ago.

My last day in Spain began with packing. After much work, I finally zipped everything up and went over to Estepona. There, my friends Mark, Nicky and Dexter threw a neighborhood water fight/going away party for me! Have I mentioned how amazing my friends are? After a crazy water fight, my friends gave me some letters and pictures and a t-shirt signed by everyone. I hardly held myself together, surrounded by such an amazing group of people. My friends asked me how I wanted to end my last day in Spain; the answer was easy for me :)

We started walking to the beach. I had to run in the sand and listen to the waves of the sea one more time under the stars, especially with them. (Don't get me wrong, I'm going to return to Spain, but this was going to be last time in a long time I'd be able to do this). I couldn't imagine a better way to spend my last evening in Spain than sitting with my friends on the sea shore. I don't know what I would've done without these amazing people:) Nicky, Mark, Lucas, Dexter, Rania, Rose... I'm so blessed to have these people as friends.

After the water fight

After returning from the beach, it was nearly 11 P.M. My host parents came to pick me up along with Mark and Nicky who would come to the airport with me in the morning. My flight left around 9 or 10, so we had to leave for Malaga around 5 or 6 I think. Naturally, we didn't sleep as I made my final preparations to leave. It was nice to just hang out with Mark and Nicky for a little while longer. As we headed out with Juan and Ana, I said goodbye to Lucy (their dog). The ride to the airport was mostly small talk about how awesome the year had been -- we were with each other and that was enough.  I always loved car rides along the coast because one can see both the sea and the mountains on the highway; this trip, however, was much more solemn. I tried hiding my tears as we approached the airport.

It wasn't long until I had to leave to go through security. This time, it was impossible to hold back the tears. I hugged everyone once, then a second time because I couldn't stand the thought of leaving. I did eventually have to go though. By the time I was in line for security I was full on balling and I felt quite bad for making the other travelers around me feel undeniably awkward.

Nicky, me, and Mark in the Malaga Airport 

From Malaga I would go to Madrid, then to Chicago, and finally to Des Moines. The trip home was tiring and I felt numb. I cried a lot of the way - it was pretty much an on and off sort of deal. I was happy that I'd be seeing my family soon, but I was devastated that I had to leave so many wonderful people in Spain, not knowing when I'd return. My cafe con leche really helped in Madrid though. That and distracting myself by making bracelets with soda tabs like Molly taught me.

I was kind of nervous about going through security/customs in Chicago, but it was surprisingly easy for me. They asked if I had any food, and I told them I had tea. I actually had Spanish ham too but I was afraid that they would take it away from me (raw meat, ya know), and the thought of losing jamon was devastating.  I got through fine, but looking back, that probably wasn't the smartest choice coming back into an American airport. ANYWAYS though, when I arrived in Chicago, I was definitely in shock. I didn't think I would actually go through reverse culture shock, but I'm telling you, it's fo real. As I was waiting for my flight from Chicago to Des Moines, I made the following list on my iPod of things that stood out to me.

I'll briefly expand on this list...

• So green - What I first though as I was arriving in the plane. Where I lived in Spain was much drier than the green fields I saw in the Midwest.
• Water towers - I saw water towers as we approached Chicago and realized that I hadn't seen them in Spain (or at least I don't think I did). This is still something that confuses me. 
• Black people/diversity - This is a bit blunt, but it's what I wrote down that day. The airport was very diverse ethnically and I wasn't used to so much diversity. I was used to Spanish people and South Americans, along with the occasional Morrocan or British person.
• People are cheerier/like to have fun with job - I felt like people were especially friendly arriving in Chicago. However, I think this may have just been a Chiago thing. I'm not sure, really.
• Overweight people - I feel like you all probably knew this was coming. I immediately noticed that people in the U.S. are bigger. Yes, there were overweight people in Spain, but not nearly to the extent  here. "Overweight" doesn't even mean in the same in the two countries!
• McDonald's/Starbucks love - I forgot how much we as Americans love Starbucks and McDonalds -- everyone had it in the airport! (Everyone has it outside the airport as well...)
• Baseball caps/basketball shorts/hats in general - Here in the United States, we dress pretty athletically. I was surprised by all the people wearing baseball caps and hats in general  as well as all the guys wearing basketball shorts.
• So much friggin English - This statement proves how poor my English had become, to say the least. I was overwhelmed by everyone speaking in English! It was  no longer a "Oh! An English-speaker; I must gravitate toward them!" kind of deal like in Spain.
• I keep replying in Spanish - This kind of goes along with the above -- I was used to speaking in Spanish! I was replying to people in security with words like "okay" and "thank you" in Spanish!
• Paying in U.S. $, what?? - This first food I bought in the U.S. was a fruit smoothie. I don't know why I bought that first. I honestly think that it just sounded good and it had the no line to wait. However, paying in dollars felt surreal. I still had a lot of Euro money in my wallet! After paying in Euros for a year, paying with dollars seemed like I was paying with fake money. 
• Fancy bathrooms - American bathrooms are much nicer than Spanish ones, simply put. Most toilets here flush automatically, there is always toilet paper in the stalls (or at least a few of the stalls), and there is soap to wash your hands. This was nice to come back to.
• I can't believe I'm in the US. I want more time in Spain. Reverse cultura shock blehhh - This was me throwing up my emotions. (Cultura = culture, by the way.) I felt like I could have stayed in Spain much longer and I was overwhelmed by all the American-ness being thrown at me all at once.
• Everyones con extra - Ipod, phones, laptops. More extreme then back in Spain... I think - For starters, "con" means with. (Yay Spanglish and poor English.) I saw so many people with their technology at hand, but I did realize that people in an airport may be much more likely to being using such technology. Now that I think about it, I do think that teens use their phones the same amount in Spain and in the US, but adults use their phones MUCH more in the U.S. than in Spain. 
• Soldiers/military - In the airport, I saw quite a few soldiers in uniform. This was very touching to me, and I'm pretty sure I teared up a little because I felt so proud to be an American, which leads us to my final point....
• Patriotism - Compared to Spain, there is much more patriotism in the U.S. and I saw that in Chicago. There were many American flags and tributes to our military. After being back for half a year, I still recognize this through the American flags hung in the town square, in classrooms, in streets, and in stores. I like this patriotism, and like I've said before: Going to Spain not only made me like Spain more, but it made me like the U.S. more.

The O'Hare was an emotional time, but I'm glad that I had some time to think to myself before reuniting with my family in Des Moines. My flight from Chicago to Des Moines was delayed, but in that time I met a guy from France who had been an exchange student to Iowa a year or two before, and was returning to visit. This was very encouraging. I also got to see Paula again, a Spanish Rotary exchange student that I met by chance in the Madrid Airport. She told me she was going to live in Burlington  Iowa, which was very exciting. It proved again just how small the world is. (Paula and I have since hung out and we have become pretty great friends through our Rotary district's exchange student events. Shout-out to Paula, one of the funniest Spaniards I've met! )

Eventually I boarded the plane after an hour delay or so. In some ways, my nerves were cooling down -- I had made it back to the U.S. alive and my trip home was almost finished! On the other hand, I couldn't wait to see my family. When I arrived in Des Moines, however, the first thing I did was NOT run to see my family. I actually had to run to the bathroom because I have this issue about going to the bathroom in planes, but it's gotten better. AFTER THAT, I went down an escalator to find my family and a few friends waiting for me. I had to awkwardly stand and stare at them as I was going down the escalator though because I had my carry-on with me and it weighed too much for me to walk down any quicker! I find this humorous. When I finally reached the bottom of the escalator I was able to embrace my family and friends again. In some ways, it felt normal to see them and be walking with them in the airport. At the same time, I couldn't believe that I was really back home.

We left the airport and then went to Famous Dave's for some good BBQ which I had dearly missed. It was so nice to be with everyone again, but again, it felt somewhat normal (definitely not what I was expecting!). We went home and my room was neatly set up for my sister and I to share since we would be hosting Nuria (she was to arrive the very next day!). I was sad because my sister was actually in Kentucky/Missouri at the time with National Fine Arts! I had to wait a few days to see her!! Jenn was with me though and we had a fun night hanging out like nothing had really changed. I was extremely tired -- I hadn't slept for some 30 hours, maybe 40 -- and I don't remember much from that day or the next. I do know that everyone truly tried to make me feel back at home, and for that I'm very grateful.

Awkwardly looking at my family as I go down the escalator.

Luke, Mom, Dad, Reece, and Jenn welcoming me home :)
I was such a tan goddess -- it's depressing how pale I've gotten.

Shelby surprised me around the corner!

Reece had grown so much!! And he cut off his Justin Bieber hair!

Home at last :) Reece, Jenn, Me, Katelyn, Natalie(Natalie grew even more than Reece!)

That's all for part one of this post. Hopefully I can get part two up soon and talk about integrating back into my family and school in the U.S. I've also had quite a few adventures with my lovely Spaniard, Nuria, so maybe I could let you all in on those.

Until then,
Josie

Like a Dream

Hey guys :)

Long time, no post, huh? Well I've been home in Iowa for almost two months already. I can't believe it. I have been so busy lately that I haven't had time to update here. That's one thing that rebounders will definitely notice -- we are so much busier as Americans. Between school, sports and work, free-time is almost non-existent.

Somehow I still manage to think about Spain everyday. Sometimes I think that I think about Spain more than my life here. Coming back has been so strange. Everything is the same. I feel as if my exchange was just a dream until I begin to look through pictures and message my friends there. Then an incredible sadness usually overwhelms me and I can't do anything but hope that I can return soon. I miss the sea, I miss Spanish, and above all I miss the amazing friends I made.

I have a lot to tell you all about my first reactions coming back to the US, but I really have to work on some homework. I thought I'd let you all know I'm still here and planning on posting every once in a while. I still have to tell you all about my last days in Spain!

Until later,
Josie

Blessed and Baffled

Hello world,

According to the countdown on my iPod, I have five days, four hours, 34 minutes, and 28 seconds until I take off on the first plane. That's insane. I basically have everything planned out that I'm going to be doing until then though. Being busy is nice, because it keeps me from thinking and freaking out too much, plus I know I'm making the most of my last days here.

On Sunday some of my friends threw me a going-away party! I thought we were just going to be chilling out at my house for the afternoon, swimming in the pool and such. But it turns out they had all written me letters and brought food and gifts. It was an amazing day. I taught them how to play the card game "Spoons" and it was a hit, no surprise -- amazing game. We even made smores and Rice Krispy treats!

Thanks so much Virginia, Lucia, Elaia, Ana, Georgia, Irina and Sergio!! Os quiero muchooo!!! <3

I'm not sure what else to tell you all. I don't know what to tell myself actually. One moment I'm living on exchange with "the end" off in the distant future, and the next moment it's in my face and I don't know how to react. How did I even get to this point? I can't believe it. At the beginning, 10 months seemed like so long. And at times, exchange was long, because it was difficult and testing. However, now I'm at the end and I say to myself, "Yeah, it's been ten months." That much I can believe. My sense of time has been distorted time and time again this year, but it's not a misleading sense of time that baffles me now -- it's the realization that this year is really over. That soon, I won't be an exchange student, living abroad anymore. That in less than a week, this particular experience in Spain will come to a close.

I will return to Spain, but it won't be like this again -- as an exchange student, living in a normal house, immersed, living life as any other Spanish teenager. Being an exchange student is such a once-in-a-lifetime experience. This year has probably been both the best and the worst year of my life, and I'll miss it so much. I would do it all over again. But what can I do now but enjoy what's left and pray that I can return as soon as possible?

Lots of love,
Josie xoxo

Exchange is Weird

Hello from Spain,

I haven't updated in a while because I've been quite busy enjoying the summer here in Spain. On the 18th was Matt's going away party. People have yet to upload photos so when they do I'll post a few. Matt left on the 20th, although it wasn't that hard to say bye because we'll be seeing each other soon in Iowa. About a week ago I went to a water park in Torremolinos with some friends. Again, I don't ave any photos -- we figured cameras and water parks don't mix that well.

Mostly I've just been chilling out with friends lately. We go swimming, watch movies, relax. I was a bit bored after getting back from Italy, but lately I've been so busy going out with friends and things Summer life is good. I finally have a solid date for returning home -- August 8th. I guess that leaves me 10 real days left here. In some ways that seems so unreal to me.

Exchange is so [for lack of a better word] weird. You come and dive into the culture, hoping to learn about yourself, make friends, and gain learning experiences. Well during the year those things happen, believe it or not. BUT THEN comes the end of the year, and you ask yourself, "Why do I have to leave all these friends? How am I possibly going to leave this place with all these new experiences?"

I look at myself now, and I can say that I've had a pretty successful exchange. I've made great friends, I've learned another language, and I've also learned a lot about myself. However, I feel a bit torn and discontent. It's like if you've moved to a new city and at the end of the first year you finally start to think, "Hey, this is going to be okay. Even if it's not my 'home' still, I'm enjoying life and I know everything is going to be alright." But then your parents say "PYSCH!" and move you back to your old city, right as you were settled in. You think, "I just went through the whole year, trying to get to this point, and you tell me now that I'm going back to where we all started?!" That's kind of how I feel. In a way. Ish. I hope you're picking up what I'm putting down, cos I'm finding it hard to explain.

I am so excited to see my family and friends in the US, but I'm leaving a whole other family and group of friends here that I don't know when I'll be able to see for the next time. It kind of kills me inside when I think about, so I try not to. I'm making the most of the time I have left and we'll see what happens from there. Sorry this ended on a bit of a sad note. I've been having so much fun and loving life lately, so don't think I'm here in Spain all sad! It's just that when I slow down to really think about things like this, it can be a bit overwhelming.

Until next time,
Josie